Samson and the Pirate Monks: Calling Men to Authentic Brotherhood

by Nate Larkin

Tags: isolation, loneliness, compulsive behavior, responsibility

With honesty and poignant storytelling, the author introduces a model of community and friendship that is reinvigorating men's ministry across the country, a model he calls The Samson Society. Looks like many men can see the biblical hero Samson as their model for manhood - a rugged individualist of the highest order. Yet, Samson's solitary successes were eventually destroyed by moral weaknesses. Nate Larkin, through the honest story of his own past and the real stories of men and women, offers a radical, refreshing alternative. Sexual addiction is the primary addiction described in this book with highlighting of the fact that all addictive behaviours have very similar roots.

Contents:

Part 1. Confessions of a preacher's kid
Part 2. I, Samson
Part 3. A new map of life
Part 4. The pirate monks

Excerpts:

I followed my companions outside to a pair of concrete benches under a tree.

A lawnmower droned in the distance. The guy from church looked me straight in the eye. “Congratulations on getting this far,” he said. “Most people never make it to the first meeting.”

“Thanks,” I said. “I’m just checking it out.”

He smiled. “I don’t know whether you’re a sex addict or not, and that’s actually not a diagnosis any of us can make. You’ll have to draw your own conclusions. Right now, we’ll just share some pieces of our own stories, and maybe you’ll hear some things you recognize.”

For the next forty minutes, I listened with astonishment as three strangers took turns describing my secret life. The details of our stories were different in many ways. Each man recounted some scenes of abuse or experimentation that were unfamiliar to me. Still, their inner lives-their emotional experiences and their perceptions of themselves and others-were almost identical to mine. The dawning realization that my problem was a common one was exhilarating and depressing all at the same time.

On one hand, I was not alone, and that was very good news. On the other hand, I was not unique. There was a term for guys like me - sex addict - and that was extremely disappointing. The bad news was now official: I was broken. I was a sex addict, and I would never become a man of integrity.

..The grandiosity of Samson has marked my life for as long as I can remember. Deep within my DNA, apparently, lies the conviction that I have been put on earth to do huge things, spectacular things, and that by virtue of my destiny I occupy a privileged place above the common run of humanity. It’s an attitude that expresses itself in strange ways, such as a reluctance to stand in line and wait my turn, or fill out forms, or follow rules. Rules, after all, are for ordinary people, and I am a special case. My grandiosity has little regard for the schedules of others and is therefore chronically late. It loves to talk. It hates to listen. It instinctively manipulates every situation to achieve its own ends, and does so shamelessly.

Oddly enough, I am also prone to bouts of self-loathing. During these moods, my accomplishments seem paltry in light of my potential, and I am mocked by the successes of others. I become one of those double-bound wretches, an egomaniac with an inferiority complex - what my friends laughingly call “the piece of crap the universe revolves around.”

These are the two faces of pride, and both of them cajole me to greater effort. They tell me I must justify myself by doing more..